The Fatherless Church

One thing I feel like I’m continually brought back to in my journey is the lack of men within the church/body. I’m not saying that the numbers of men are declining or anything like that. What I am saying is that I rarely see men that are willing to step up, engage, and take responsibility for younger men. Our American culture has painted us this picture of “church” in which the responsibility is all upon the leaders/pastors/etc. It’s their “job” to lead everyone into spirituality. Whenever someone has an issue or a problem that needs help or prayer, they take it up to the pastors/leaders. 

 The more I talk to young men from our generation, the more I see men that are apathetic to the church. It’s an attitude of “they don’t know me and they don’t care”. Our generation is one that is crying out for authenticity, honesty, and truth, probably more than any before us. Our generation doesn’t want programs, lists, expectations.  So many young men I talk to are longing for someone to come alongside them in their journey – not to point out their sin or tell them what they need to do. No, they just want someone who’s walked the road, who’s taken similar shots in their life, to come along side them and relate to them from their own experiences.

So my question remains – where are all the men in the church? The need is there. Where are the men who will take responsibility for the younger generation? The more I am around older men the more I see a generation of men that have been worn down by life. This is obviously an assumption, but I think that most men don’t believe they have anything to offer. They feel as though they are just barely keeping their own head above water, trying to keep everything from crashing in on them. Marriage, kids, finances, family, etc. All of that going on and they’re probably just trying to experience what little “life” they can in the midst of it all. Not only have these men been spending years of their life just trying to make it… they’re trying to do it ALONE. The first thing to go for men is relationships with other men.  It is so rare to hear of men that have other men in their life that they are close with. Not just someone to play golf or poker with, but someone who knows what’s truly going on in their life. Men have grown used to making it through life alone. What’s funny is that if you ask them and they’re really honest, it seems like most men really are longing for that though. They’re longing for other men to come along side them, relate to them, get to know their story.  Deep down, men want to share, they want to talk about what’s going on. I don’t believe the problem is that men aren’t willing to share, the problem is that men aren’t willing to listen.